Posted by rogerhollander in Economic Crisis, Humor, Uncategorized.
Tags: banksters, Economic Crisis, economy collapse, financial industry, Humor, humour, roger hollander, stephen day, subprime loans, subprime morgtgates
Roger’s note: I have read a couple of “simple” explanations of the 2008 market collapse, with its subprime loans, etc. One of these explanations talked of selling plastic bags filled with oregano as if it were marijuana. The article below is both humorous and illuminating.
This is a great explanation of what caused our world economy collapse. The banks rewarded poor credit risks by finding ways to invest in junk. For those who have short memories, think of our bankrupt auto companies, Merrill Lynch, AIG, Lehman Brothers, etc.
The mess that Obama inherited was caused by the Financial industry that lives off of commissions and transaction fees, with absolutely no oversight and producing no products. Is there a kinder word for “bottom feeders”?
When you read this amusing story, I am sure you will connect this to our present financial environment for the last 15 years.
Mary is the proprietor of a bar in Dublin . She realizes that virtually all of her customers are unemployed alcoholics and, as such, can no longer afford to patronise her bar.
To solve this problem, she comes up with a new marketing plan that allows her customers to drink now, but pay later. She keeps track of the drinks consumed on a ledger (thereby granting the customers loans).
Word gets around about Mary’s “drink now, pay later” marketing strategy and, as a result, increasing numbers of customers flood into Mary’s bar. Soon she has the largest sales volume for any bar in Dublin.
By providing her customers’ freedom from immediate payment demands, Mary gets no resistance when, at regular intervals, she substantially increases her prices for wine and beer, the most consumed beverages. Consequently, Mary’s gross sales volume increases massively.
A young and dynamic vice-president at the local bank recognises that these customer debts constitute valuable future assets and increases Mary’s borrowing limit. He sees no reason for any undue concern, since he has the debts of the unemployed alcoholics as collateral
At the bank’s corporate headquarters, expert traders figure a way to make huge commissions, and transform these customer loans into DRINKBONDS, ALKIBONDS and PUKEBONDS. These securities are then bundled and traded on international security markets. Naive investors don’t really understand that the securities being sold to them as AAA secured bonds are really the debts of unemployed alcoholics. Nevertheless, the bond prices continuously climb, and the securities soon become the hottest-selling items for some of the nation’s leading brokerage houses.
One day, even though the bond prices are still climbing, a risk manager at the original local bank decides that the time has come to demand payment on the debts incurred by the drinkers at Mary’s bar. He so informs Mary.
Mary then demands payment from her alcoholic patrons, but being unemployed alcoholics they cannot pay back their drinking debts.Since, Mary cannot fulfil her loan obligations she is forced into bankruptcy. The bar closes and the eleven employees lose their jobs.
Overnight, DRINKBONDS, ALKIBONDS and PUKEBONDS drop in price by 90%. The collapsed bond asset value destroys the banks liquidity and prevents it from issuing new loans, thus freezing credit and economic activity in the community.
The suppliers of Mary’s bar had granted her generous payment extensions and had invested their firms’ pension funds in the various BOND securities. They find they are now faced with having to write off her bad debt and with losing over 90% of the presumed value of the bonds.
Her wine supplier also claims bankruptcy, closing the doors on a family business that had endured for three generations, her beer supplier is taken over by a competitor, who immediately closes the local plant and lays off 150 workers.
Fortunately though, the bank, the brokerage houses and their respective executives are saved and bailed out by a multi-billion euro no-strings attached cash infusion from their cronies in Government. The funds required for this bailout are obtained by new taxes levied on employed, middle-class, non-drinkers who have never been in Mary’s bar.
Now, do you understand economics in 2015?
Posted by rogerhollander in Barack Obama, Humor.
Tags: 1984, big brother, Humor, joe giambrone, political satire, president obama, propaganda, roger hollander, satire, syrian rebels, truth, white house
Uncle Barack by Political Film Blog
By Joe Giambrone (about the author)
September 15, 2013, http://www.opednews.com/
(Washington) In a radical departure from official White House policy, unnamed sources within the Executive have suggested that President Barack Obama may be preparing to utter true statements, sometime in the short term.
Uncharacteristically candid revelations hint that bypassing the wall of secrecy and over classification of intelligence may be necessary to sway skeptical Americans. Polls of the President’s truthfulness have fluctuated from 62% trustworthiness in 2009 to 0.62% today, a difference of two levels of magnitude. Individuals who trust the President’s statements are largely confined to state mental health facilities, making interviews difficult to obtain prior to publication.
The estate of President Richard Nixon weighed in on the matter, coming to the defense of the President. “When the president does it, that means it is not illegal,” said a Nixon spokesman. President Obama, hoping that Americans’ recollections of the disgraced Nixon have faded, after nearly half a century of revisionism, welcomed the move as a legal defense against charges of perjury, lying to congress, propaganda, deception and fabricating false flag terrorism in the Syrian conflict.
Asked why America was so intent on aiding and abetting the Al Qaeda offshoot Al Nusra Front, which is technically designated a terrorist organization by the US, the president responded, “You’re off the script.”
A scuffle in the White House press room led to one journalist being removed by black clad security personnel without explanation. Off the record, several of the reporters present recall hearing gunfire shortly afterward, although none could give any more detail.
In lighter news, America’s beloved freedom fighters have liberated a second Christian village in Syria, and have promised not to behead any of the infidels who refuse to convert to Sunni Islam. The President praised this development as a positive sign that the Syrian Jihadists are coming out of their 7th century mindsets and perhaps moving forward into the 8th or even 9th. Mr. Obama said that such historical progress cannot pass without a moment of reflection and congratulation to the heroic Syrian rebels.
Obama’s Director of Imperial Marketing, whom some of the journalists present suspected of being a DARPA developed robot drone in humanoid form, said, “East Asia has always been at war with Oceania.”
Cryptic news indeed, as the reporters struggled to identify the two warring nations on their SmartPhones. Obama’s Marketing Director then pointed to Youtube as proof that, “Syria bad. We good. Syria bad. We good,” repeating the phrase for several minutes until a group of technicians entered the press briefing to remove the Director in mid utterance. Such odd behavior led some to question the spokesman’ humanity, leading to a new raft of conspiracy theories floated out across the web.
The administration, sensing a probable public relations imbroglio went into damage control mode. The President appeared on a large video teleconference screen, staring down at the journalists in a formidable posture.
“Oceania has always been at war with East Asia,” said Mr. Obama. “That is your top headline story, and so you be sure to type it out correctly.”
The visibly shaken press corps dutifully nodded in unison.
The President continued, “Our administration is only capable of telling the truth. Write that down.”
The President issued his directives, and we are happy to report that God has smiled on our glorious land, an exceptional land of happiness and joy. All is well, as it always is in our land of greatest freedom where our beloved President looks out for us, and would never lie to us. Such joy it brings to report this good news to you, dear readers. Enjoy your wonderful day of supreme elation, knowing that we are right and just and good. President Obama has made that quite clear.
Author of HELL OF A DEAL: A Supernatural Satire, a tale of Hollywood’s accommodation with torture and (more…)
Posted by rogerhollander in Canada, Foreign Policy, Humor.
Tags: afghnaistan war, Canada, canada conservative, canada government, canada mining, foreign policy, Humor, humour, political satire, richard nixon prize, roger hollander, satire, Stephen Harper, tar sands, yves engler
by YVES ENGLER
At a ceremony in New York today the Appeal of Conscience Foundation will present Stephen Harper with its World Statesman of the Year award. Former U.S. secretary of state Henry Kissinger will deliver the prize.
Canada’s Prime Minister is really racking up the hardware. This morning a coalition of international and community groups announced that Harper has won the first ever Richard Nixon Prize. The award is given to a leader for pursuing “principled, forthright and steadfast international policies in the interests of the rich and powerful, regardless of the consequences” to everyone else.
The decision to grant Harper the Richard Nixon Prize was made after a thorough review of his foreign policy.
The grantees cited Harper’s “consistent backing of the interests of North America’s top 1% of income earners, with a special emphasis on supporting those who make their billions from resource extraction, weaponry and banking.”
The committee applauded Harper for bombing Libya into democracy. It took special note that this was probably also good for certain oil and gas interests.
“In the best tradition of Richard Nixon who could always keep a straight face,” the committee praised Harper for at the same time “standing by Egypt’s Hosni Mubarak until the final hours of his 30-year presidency.”
In Afghanistan the Prime Minister has stayed committed to war even though most Canadians want to bring the troops home, the prize committee said in a statement. Harper’s decision to continue to deploy 1,000 troops as well as special forces is exactly what America’s 37th president would have done. “Canadian special forces play an important role in US-led nighttime assassination raids. When a parliamentary committee began asking inappropriate questions about Afghan detainees Harper refused to buckle and simply closed shop,” said the committee’s statement. “Richard Nixon would have been proud.”
The committee also analyzed several more obscure aspects of Harper’s international policy.
“We applaud Canada’s decision to send 2,000 troops to Haiti days after the 2010 earthquake. It took real courage to send troops to ‘secure order’ for Haiti’s elite when many other countries misguidedly focused on search and rescue teams to pull injured people from under rubble.”
Despite Harper’s Conservative government being the biggest backer of the world’s mining industry, ordinary Canadians just don’t understand how valuable this is to the wealthy, the committee said. “We appreciate the Prime Minister’s commitment to advancing Canadian mining companies’ interests abroad. All investors benefit.”
As for calls that Ottawa should regulate Canadian mining corporations’ behavior abroad, “Conservative officials have repeatedly pointed out that most companies have corporate social responsibility programs to take care of any problems they may face with noisy indigenous communities in Latin America or elsewhere. That’s exactly the position Richard Nixon would have taken.” The prize committee also noted that many of the individuals running big Canadian mining companies are good people who fund university programs, think tanks and other initiatives designed to defend the way of life of the 1%.
As for one of the most controversial foreign affairs issues he’s dealt with Harper’s made a simple – and correct – calculation, the committee said. While almost the entire world backs the Palestinians in their bid for a small state, why should we? As Richard Nixon certainly believed, Canada’s job is to support the United States and the West, in that order.
Finally, the Richard Nixon Prize grantees said they thoroughly support Harper’s international environmental policy. “The Prime Minister has firmly challenged those in Washington and Europe who call the tar sands “dirty oil”. At international climate negotiations Harper has made the tough decision to support more carbon in our atmosphere rather than simply accede to an overwhelming international consensus. His government repeatedly blocked climate negotiations and withdrew Canada from the Kyoto protocol, what he once correctly called a ‘socialist scheme’ to suck money out of rich countries.”
The Richard Nixon Prize will be given to Prime Minister Harper the next time he visits Honduras, where he helped overthrow the elected president, who was such a pain in the ass.
Yves Engler’s latest book is Lester Pearson’s Peacekeeping: the truth may hurt.